Peace, Love, Understanding...and Choices

 *In the process of writing this blog entry a few things have happened that have shaken me to my core. At one point...I almost deleted the whole thing. However, I felt deleting it would only discredit who I am as a person and the authentic direction I wanted this blog to go. I write in real time as an observer to the raw and real world around me. I know I am as opinionated as they come and as honest as they get and I know that that pisses people off...but I also know that not publishing this piece would do a disservice to me, you, and the nature of this blog. 

However...before I go into this actual post I needed to take a minute to recognize those we/I have lost this past year...these deaths are not my story to tell but still, these souls deserve a dedication. So I am doing just that. 

Hattie, Elizabeth, Jack, and Romey and to all those whom have lost their lives due to Covid or from situations that ultimately came about because of this pandemic...this post is dedicated to you. I will continue to speak my truth for you! 

So we are back to this? Back to where it all started. Lockdowns, curfews, mask mandates....and that one game that I thoroughly enjoyed for the first three months of this year, “The Great Scavenger Hunt of 2020!” Except in this hunt, there isn’t a prize at the end, just a precious pack of toilet paper found. Which let’s be honest...feels like a finding lost treasure after all is said and done. 

Have 12 months not taught us anything? 

Apparently not...because...here we are....right back at the beginning. Maybe this is why I feel like this year-even though it’s damn near over-just actually begun? 

I feel like I’m living in the Twilight Zone. I feel like I’m patiently waiting for this episode to end. I’m patiently waiting for the narrator to come on so he can explain the lessons we needed to learn...but he’s never coming on...because we haven’t learned a damn thing. 

I’m patiently waiting for Willy Wonka’s Oompa Loompa’s to finally wrap up their song sequence but they aren’t doing that either and this song has been on a continuous loop. Covid is our metaphorical blueberry and we haven’t learned anything from the girl who wasn’t supposed to eat said blueberry. 

And while I’m at it can someone please for the love of holy condiments, explain to me why I can’t find any fucking soy sauce anywhere? 

This is the longest “flu season” ever in the existence of all flu seasons. So much so, it deserves to be placed in the Guinness Book of World Records....right next to the guy who can stuff his mouth with the most marshmallows. 

And because of all of this...I’m convinced that this year Santa has checked out and has asked Krampus to tap in. So don’t be surprised when the treats left out don’t get eaten and your toys start attacking you. It is 2020 after all. 

The sad thing is had we ALL actually banded together, instead of disregarding the reality of this pandemic, we’d probably be close to the end of this mess. Yet, such is not the case-as we all can see! And no...this isn’t a media takeover for shits and giggles as I am positive no news reporter enjoys repeating stats surrounding daily loss of life in record numbers. 

And unless you’re an ostrich, there is no excuse for your irresponsible choice to ignore facts and science. 

Your need to travel, to go out and about, to prove that “you can’t be controlled” has now set us back. Ten. Fucking. Fold. 

Way to go, people. You sure do make selfishness look easy and here I’ve had a problem with that my entire life. 

But before I get into all that...I just have to say thank you to those that have been taking this pandemic seriously. This post isn’t for you. You are doing everything right! Please continue on as we head into next year.

But to those that haven’t...you are the reason we are in this mess and it’s time to finally take some accountability. 

You now have a broken economy in your wallet! 

You now have blood on your hands!

You are the now the guilty party! 

We wanted you to have an inch but you took a mile instead. 

The curfews are your fault. 

The mask mandates are your fault. 

The closed businesses are your fault. 

Every tragic result from this pandemic is your fault. 

BECAUSE SUCH A MENIAL TASK AS PUTTING OTHERS BEFORE YOURSELF WAS SOMETHING YOU JUST COULDN’T GRASP. 

Instead, you wanted to play the blame game...but let me set the record straight...no government or elite group caused this insanity. 

You did. 

Pandemics have no hidden agendas to divide and conquer...and if you think that well then...you need some bonafide straight up help. Instead of figuring out what you can do better, you have insisted of singing the same, “Woe is Me” tune like a broken fucking record and I dare say that the way we treat our environment and each other, this won’t be our last global pandemic and it won’t be our last global catastrophe either. There will be more but at least we all know now how you will respond. Like a self-righteous prick who believes the world only revolves around them. 

And if while reading this you had the sudden urge to whip back to the screen in a verbal frenzy about how “this global pandemic has infringed upon your precious and oh so ever important life,” then it’s you who needs this Christmas lesson in humility the most.  Buckle up, buttercup...it’s going to be a bumpy ride. 

I can’t tell you what to do though...so stop reading this post if you must...but, for your sake and those around you, I really hope you don’t....

...because just like that choice to ignore this post like everything else you have chosen to ignore in the last year...you have another choice as well...a choice to go into 2021 and do things differently. 

However, if you chose to opt out of this post...just remember one thing...your failure to step up and be an example of good, DIVIDED US. Not your government. Not those who are taking precautions. Not those that are trying to combat this issue. You. You divided us. You drew the line in the sand and coughed all over it. 

Most importantly though, try to remember this approach that you have taken has just caused more strife. It hasn’t helped one iota. And if you say you want things to get back to normal then start acting like it because the only way they can, is if you stop complaining and start participating. You have a giant hand in how this all shapes out as well. 

I’m not a sheep because wearing a mask didn’t throw me over the edge. I’m not weak because I postponed traveling. I’m not losing my shit because every move I make requires a little more patience and concern for myself and those around me. I’m not throwing a goddamn temper tantrum because I had to adjust. It’s called fucking life and what I see around me is a bunch of adults acting as if they have never been inconvenienced until now. 

And yea part of me gives zero fucks about whether or not y’all kill each other off because that would mean there is one less asshole we don’t have to deal with but unfortunately there is a catch 22. Your reckless behavior will inevitably take some innocent victim down with you and they don’t deserve to be the bearer of your bad decisions. 

Somewhere in your life, you learned along the way that this is your show and we are all just the extras in it and I feel sorry for you. 

This message of self-importance that was so heavily instilled has done absolutely nothing for your own personal growth and it shows. 

The irony of this...I can almost guarantee that each and every one of you would feed and help a wounded animal without a second thought but walk right over a homeless person without a care in the world. Only if the human population cared about each other the way it does its furry friends, we’d be leaps and bounds on a conscious level. 

The truth is vast majority of us have not been majorly affected by this pandemic. We’ve just had to adjust. Most of us still have our homes, still have our health, still have the ability to work! Most of us still have everything we need and then some.

And with absolutely certainty I can say,  anyone stuck in a hospital right now or anyone who has lost someone from Covid or situations stemming from Covid or anyone who has lost a job...or even an essential worker that has to cater to you, would trade places with you in a heartbeat...but....would you be willing to trade with them? I bet everything that you wouldn’t. I bet everything you’d stay right where you are because complaining is way easier than walking in someone else’s shoes. 

You can’t see the forest for the trees. You can’t think beyond your own personal needs. Your need to live life to fullest and live each day like you will spontaneously combust if you aren’t going somewhere or doing something every damn day or weekend is insane. You are not a weekend warrior...you’re an asshole....and you’re just prolonging this dumpster fire disaster from being put out but since you want to dictate how massive this fire gets, you go ahead and tell me how and when it ends? I’ll wait. 

If you need a fucking night out, I get it....I want one too!!! But really...now is not the fucking time. And if you are worried about a business and its employees, open your wallet and support it somehow. Get creative with that shit because the last time I checked you don’t have to physically be there to do this.

The same rules apply to traveling. And before you get all uppity because that trip just had to happen and there was no other time you could take it, I understand there are extreme cases where flying is necessary...but most of you...are NOT traveling for emergency purposes...you are traveling for leisure. So don’t expect some medal or a round of applause once you come back...and definitely stop moaning and groaning because everyone isn’t on board with your narcissistic tendencies. 

My word people, I never realized the lot of you were such social butterflies with a million things to do and a million people to see. Half you never went out like this...and the only reason you are now is because you’re being advised not to. That’s it...an advisory. 

The ole proverbial cookie in the cookie jar...the ole...you want what you can’t have. 

And while we are on the topic of a million faces you have to see...let’s talk holidays. 

Most of you that are complaining about your holidays being ruined because you can’t go anywhere...were the very same ones that complained about having to go on those holidays. You didn’t want to travel and spend a lengthy amount time with your bat shit, crazy Uncle Joe pre pandemic but now! Now! You don’t mind your crazy uncle and nobody’s gonna stop you from watching that mother fucker almost set the Christmas tree on fire for the 12th year in a row. Nobody can’t tell you nothing! Fuck these suggestions. 

I actually like my family and I will visit them eventually. When there is less of a risk that I might kill one of ‘em because you see I’m not into funerals and I’m certainly not into the idea of being the cause of said funeral fucking happening. And even though I haven’t caught Covid I have had a number of relatives and friends that have. I still have a relative in the hospital because of it and he’s going on month three or four. But by all means...keep whining about how you can’t see the people you weren’t that keen on seeing in the first damn place. 

People are fucking dying and your complaining about a piece of cloth covering your mouth. 

People are losing their businesses and their income and livelihoods and your whining about having to stay home and work in your pj’s. 

People are losing their homes, and your crying because your bored in yours. 

People are losing everything, and your ranting on about losing a vacation or a night out. 

Oh the travesty. 

Now, I know I can’t tell you how to live your life. Not that you will listen anyway but before we head into 2021...think! Think about everything that has gone on this year and where you stood in the thick of it? 

I’m not telling you to lock yourself up and throw away the key but the reason we are still in this giant ass mess is because people are not slowing down. You don’t have to stop, just slow it the fuck down. 

This isn’t a competition to see who we can destroy the fastest but the way we are playing it...that’s exactly what it’s turned into. 

And although I have enjoyed my home’s walls...I too...would like life back to its regular programming instead of being stuck on your channel. 

I don’t give a damn who you are. Rich, poor, celebrity, normal....we are all dealing with this. We are all on this playing field together. For once, we are all on the same team. Can’t you see that? Can’t you, for a second, realize that without you being a part of this too, we’ll never win. 

A Note to the Famous Ones: 

If you hold any clout, then do what you can to influence those around you. 

Instead of telling me to “stay home” and “how to wash my hands”...which...by the way...I didn’t need your input on either, heed your own damn advice. 

Make sure you aren’t just saying this shit for airtime and you are actually following through on it because it’s really hard to take you seriously when you aren’t. 

And for the love of music...no more John Lennon covers. In 2021, I don’t want to hear one single Lennon lyric getting muttered. Not a peep from you fuckers. 

You know what I Imagine? That you assholes sit your asses down and shut the fuck up. I don’t want to see you going to award ceremonies and fancy parties and fashion runway shows then a few weeks later post what’s supposed to be some meaningful blurb about how concerned you are about rising Covid cases. Maybe you should have thought about this first instead of your celebrity status. 

You do understand that your fans hold onto every move you make and every word you say with bated breath, right? And many of you...no matter how much I am a fan, have lost so much of my respect. Instead of feeling excited when I see something with you in it...I cringe now. And this makes me really sad. I thought more highly of you...I expected more. 

And don’t for a second talk about how rough the responsibilities behind being famous are. Your fame is the reason you have everything that you do. It’s the reason you get treated like royalty everywhere you go...and clearly you don’t mind these responsibilities when you are receiving the perks from the job but if it seems like too big of a shoe to fill, you can always walk away from your fame and fortune at any time. Just like any career path, celebrity comes with responsibilities and obligations as well. The only difference is you get a hell of a lot more for doing a hell of a lot less. 

A Note to Everyone Else:

We all have the freedom of choice and I hope 2021 brings better ones. We can and should do better. 

In 2021 please grow passed your rebellious 2020 years. Instead of feeling like you have to climb out that bedroom window to go to that party your parents said no to, earn some trust and walk through the fucking front door. It’s that simple. These insane rules that have been put into place are because a select few believe rules don’t apply to them. Every country gave us adults the opportunity to be responsible and we failed. You took the rules and bent them and now we’re all in time out. 

For almost a year...I have made the best out of this terrible situation. And guess what people, these decisions haven’t stopped me from enjoying fucking life and they weren’t made by force. I didn’t have a gun to my head. I’m just a decent fucking human being. 

I’m grateful. I’m one of the lucky ones and with gratitude comes a great responsibility to execute compassion and empathy. There are many far worse than I and I refuse to gloat and act like those that are struggling aren’t my concern or problem. 

This year, I looked inward and followed through on many a personal goal that was always distracted by some other new and shiny thing. Instead of crying about what I couldn’t do, I threw myself head first into the things that I could. Tulum will still be there, that concert will come back, that date night can still happen just in a different way, my hair can grow long, my nails don’t have to be done, I can turn my living room into the gym, etc...etc...etc. 

And when people ask me, “How did you fare this year?” I reply, “I actually did alright.” Because it’s the fucking truth and it could have been a lot worse. 

I refuse to be part of a problem therefore I choose to be part of the solution. I am and will continue to be more patient, kind, and tolerant. I am and will continue to lay low because no one needs one more asshole cook in this tiny kitchen. I am and will continue to look for creative ways to lend a hand to those that need it most. Friends, family, small businesses...my presence doesn’t matter, my wallet however does...and the smallest contribution counts for something. 

I am and will continue on this road of peace, love, and understanding because what is so funny about that? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. 

And...if this year...was some sort of social experiment? Well then...we did miserably as a whole this go round. 

In 2021, put your short fuse to rest. Put your anger and frustration and meanness and selfishness aside. 

It’s time for a new path. It’s time to get over this hump instead of tumbling back down the same side over and over and over again. 

And here’s the thing...I do believe most of you are good and there is, at least, a shred of decency left. It may be hard to find but I know it’s in there and won’t give up this search. 

This blog was initially started as a creative outlet. I was bursting with energy and I needed to store it somewhere. I also just wanted to start writing again. It turned into a therapy session...a way to cope with 10 years worth of chaos crammed into 365 days. It became my release from all that went down in 2020. It became the ominous eye examining everything around me and I’m proud that I stuck with it and was actively involved. I’m not sure where my emotions would be without it? I guess everything, when it comes down to it, is all about perspective. 

This post will be the last for the year and I’m alright with closing it out in pseudo Christmas card form. Thank you for coming on this journey with me, it’s been a wild one. 

Dear Readers: 

While 2020 comes to a close, I’m urging all of you to reflect on this past year. Reflect on your hand in it and where you stood the entire time. Reflect on how you can improve because growth is ever evolving. Go into 2021 with love in you heart and hate hung out to dry. Walk more patiently and kind and fill your cup with gratitude because you are still here. You made it through, while so many never got the chance to. Celebrate your tiny victories and raise a toast to your strength...because this year has tested you and you deserve the internal break. Go into next year with eyes full of sparkle and a gusto to correct the errors of your ways. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes...but you have a chance now and an opportunity to show the world what you have learned and how you can change. Keep moving forward even if it’s at snail’s pace. Be good to yourself but most importantly, be good to others because that’s what really counts. 

Warmest hugs and Happy Holidays! 

Be safe out there and I’ll see you next year. 

~The Blogging Bae