Weird Ride Ticket For One

 Tomorrow is the 1st of December and it only makes sense that this year ends exactly the same way it began: me doing a double take and wondering what the hell is going on? True story… this entire year has got to be one of the most consistently strange years I have experienced in long damn time. And, I have 31 more days of it. I’m not complaining. It is a year that has kept me on my toes and I don’t mind that but as I am writing this and thinking about everything that has occurred from start to finish throughout this year, I am almost certain some of you would be wondering what the hell is going on as well? 

Let’s list some of them shall we… you know… just so you and I are both on the same page. By the way, this is a condensed list otherwise we’d be here all damn day and I have shit to do and I am assuming you do too. 

Number One…

This year started out with a banger. After 20 years of off and on searching, I found the long, lost soul I had been looking for. Just like that. As in… Poof! They magically showed up. My search always came up empty handed so I want to be completely clear when I say this, I had zero hope that they would be found. To the point, I almost didn’t even look for them. I had done the same thing I had always done when searching for this person with only one major change-I dropped their last name and just put the location where I knew they last lived. Low and behold, fifth profile down was theirs. This occurred on day three of me disregarding the nagging sensation to look one more time. Right before I found their profile, I told myself, “I will instinctively know that it’s this person.” I also told myself that if this search comes up empty again, I am not looking again… EVER! Come to find out, I have actually found them several times within my 20 year search but because the last name didn’t match the one I remembered, I dismissed the photos I saw every single time. To be fair, all these times were unattached to social accounts because social media wasn’t as prevalent as it is now. The photos I also found never had a face attached to them. Just a name. The only thing I could decipher because I don’t speak any other language than English. 

Don’t get me wrong, I can understand some German and most Spanish and right now, I am learning Italian but no, I don’t speak their language. Not enough to understand a blurb attached to an unidentifiable photo. I know yes, love, miss, kisses, forest, and boy… that’s about it and well… that’s definitely not enough to overcome a language barrier-especially when you are seeking out someone in another foreign country!

However, in January the easiest task that had been such an arduous one broke the record of WTF! Yes, I said WTF because it was most definitely a WTF moment and it continues to be one.

Moving On…

I was in the grocery store earlier this year and a woman who seemingly came out of nowhere decided to tell me to, “LOOK FOR THE BUTTERFLIES.” I thought she was just trying to tell me to buy a specific brand of butter as we were in the butter section of the store… or I just thought she was crazy or maybe possibly talking to herself? No, she was talking to me. I had her repeat what she said. Taken aback and confused I said, “I’m not really sure what you mean? Is there a specific butter I can grab you?” She laughed lightly then continued, “Butterflies are a totem animal for you at this time and you need to look for them. They will give you the answers you seek.” Is it that obvious that I am one of those people! You know… the type that is easily recognizable as a sign seeker? That type of person that connects the dots in order to see the whole picture more clearly? Maybe so? I really don’t know. From what I understand about butterflies, they are a symbol of metamorphosis and change. They are a symbol of strength and taking flight. This year, I feel like I am doing just that. I finally went after a long term goal: writing a novel series. A new path I want to be on. A personal story that I have cherished and decided to change and turn into a fictional and romantic tale. A passionate hobby that I honestly believe will take me to the next level. All the signs pointing to this. The butterfly showing me how.

Next…

France. I swear, I can’t go one day without seeing something about France. I live in the western part of the United States. Far removed from all things French but oh no… that won’t stop France my infiltrating every move I make. As I said in one post, I could be minding my own damn business, walking down an empty street and something or someone will whizz by holding up a French flag or sticker or photo alluding to France. The other night I turned on my TV and rerun from show filmed in 90’s came on. The episode was taking place in Paris. You have got to be kidding? I was literally shocked at the timing because yet again I was minding my own damn business and not seeking this shit out. Let’s not even go into the amount of ‘Parisian Life’ photos that seem to have taken my Instagram hostage or the two French people that slid into my DM’s in the last year. I only know one person that lives in France and we don’t talk that much. Not enough for an IG algorithm to be all French, all the damn time. Oh and did I mention, while visiting family this year, I discovered my youngest nephew is learning French. If any language needs to learned here, it’s Spanish. He chose French… okay whatever. I will take that as a coincidence but here’s the thing… not only is France all over me on my social platforms but now Frenchies are taking my Spotify by storm. That story is going to be saved for last so bear with me, please. 

Strange Occurrences Continue…

I, every time I look, am finding nothing but repetitive number sequences. Not just on clocks but everywhere. License plates, phone number, random places where numbers are found: 555. 111, 1111, 222, 444, 1616…etc. Yesterday, every time I looked at my phone, it was like this: 1515, 1717, 2121, 2323. With this said, something huge better be coming my way. As this is an indication of just that. Something huge. Again, I am not sitting around forcing this to happen. Just like I am minding my own business when it comes to other things in life, I’m not planning out how I can run into repeating number sequences. It just keeps happening. Oh did I mention, every time I turn around, I am seeing a butterfly in some form. Yea… it’s like this. France. Check. Same number patterns. Check, check. Butterflies. Check, check, fucking check. 

Now onto the biggie. The one that by far is now taking up all of my curious attention… 

A few days ago, I wrote a blog post mainly to thank someone for the kind gesture they did. They-whomever they are-made a playlist for me.  A person after my own musical heart. They did it in a way that was elusive though. This playlist wasn’t directly pointed out and to be brutally honest, they truly had a 50/50 shot of me even seeing the damn thing to begin with. The only way I discovered it was by noticing I had a new follower on Spotify. I don’t have a huge amount of followers and I will admit, I don’t always follow back or even look into what a follower listens to. This time though, as if I was divinely guided to do so, I peeped this person’s playlists. They only have two. One of which was made for me! In the description, plain as day is  a note written, Made for Regina Hope. Like I said in that thankful post, I am Regina Hope. Now for a minute there I just figured this “follower” is a generated Spotify user. Meaning, they don’t really exist and it is just a playlist Spotify created for me. But there is no way that is possible. Spotify, themselves, do not individually follow people and the personal playlists they create for listeners are in a completely different section. Also, I don’t listen to enough of this genre where Spotify would make a playlist like this for me. It should also be said, that a personal user is the only one that can fill out a description that specific. 

Here is the kicker. The entire playlist is in French minus a few techno songs and that one Sting duet that has now since disappeared. I have some sneaky suspicions concerning who made this playlist for me. But only because some of the songs are eerily on point when I translated them and also some of the titles could, no do but could, correlate to them. Regardless, I’m not going to ask said individual about it. 

For starters, every time I contact this person I am either ignored, dismissed or treated as if they’d rather cut off their own ears than talk to me… so I stopped. I have better things to do than beg or chase for attention from someone and after the 12th round of being ignored, I learned my lesson. Secondly, I have asked a few times already if they have a Spotify account. The answer is always no so maybe just maybe, it’s all just one amazing coincidence. Even though I STRONGLY BELIEVE most things are NOT coincidental at all. I also know that someone in France regularly reads this blog. Just like someone in Portugal does and just like a few people in Germany do, so who really knows? 

In addition to that, this blog often has playlists I create attached to it. Which again, this follower could be anyone? I will say this though, it’s taking every fiber in being to try and convince myself that this playlist is random as fuck. I will also say, some of the songs I did happen to translate sound angry as hell and from where I stand, I am not even sure this person who put this playlist together thinks too highly of me? So what exactly is the point? If this is some stranger or the person that reads my blog in France, I am a little confused as to what I did that pissed you off? If it’s the person I actually know, the way I am acting is a directly linked to how I have been treated. I am going off the signals they are giving me: THEY WANT ME TO LEAVE THEM THE FUCK ALONE and I am.  

I’ve said it once and I will say it again, I am really good at digging and I am certain, I was once a private investigator in a past life. But after a year from digging and trying to continually figure out what everything means, I am exhausted. I am now just ready to receive answers instead of another round of questions. I want answers to all these mysterious occurrences that are happening. Solid, concrete answers that no longer keep me in the dark. I mean, don’t get me wrong… I love a good mystery just as much as the next guy but one right after the other is nuts. I am a writer in this life not a P.I. And although, I appreciate the musical sentiment, I wish is wasn’t such a damn secret as to who made it and why it was made for me… and why some songs disappear like there has been a switch in mood? For the record, I haven’t translated every song. I can’t because that would not only take forever but also like I said, they keep changing the songs so I can’t really keep up with them all. I ALSO HATE TO BE THAT PERSON but right now, it’s almost necessary… I need some of these songs to be in English unless whomever this is truly never wants to be found out. 

I guess for now, I just have to appreciate the fact that someone thought enough about me to dedicate a playlist to me. I guess for now, I just have to sit back and wait patiently for all the questions to this year’s mystic crazy ride to be answered. Until then, I am only left assuming. Bring on December and let’s see what other weird shit could possibly happen? Don’t worry, I will let you know. 

~x~

The Blogging Bae